At What Price My Addiction?

My water bill's due quarterly. I get it in plenty of time to pay it. But....it's one of those stupid companies who are still balking at jumping on that internet thing so far, but they're so happy to inform me I can drop it off at 45 locations completely inconvenient to me instead. So I have to make sure I allow days to mail it, which I forget to do every time. Maybe it's the quarterly thing. I wonder how long it took Pavlov's dog to get it right? I dunno. Anyway, I forgot again and left myself stuck having to go drop it off. Honestly, it really couldn't get much more convenient since it's right down the street, but having to leave the computer, the house, and the neighborhood is more than enough to knock my inner convenience stick all out of whack. 

I had just emailed Jay to tell him I have to venture out into the great outdoors (it's a big event for us when this happens), and I said I really wanted a Coke, but did I want it bad enough to get out of the car? He was confident in my ability to overcome the harsh winter elements in pursuit of that which I needed - Caffeine and sugar. 

Since it's so windy today, I added my saucy hat to my wardrobe. I like to wear it even though I can't really see out from under it, and In my mind I know it makes me look like a garden gnome with my head down and my huge puffy coat on, but in my heart it makes me feel kicky and chic, so I play along. 

I dropped off my bill and headed to the gas station for my Coke. I parked in front and deliberately left the car unlocked 'cuz I knew my hands would be full. I got my stuff, came back out, and balanced a 12-pack on my thigh while I opened the back door. Except it didn't open. Realizing I probably only unlocked the driver's door to begin with, I put the soda down, pulled my keys out of my purse (which I also hadn't bothered to dig out earlier 'cuz of the whole the car's already unlocked thing I had going on). I push the unlock button, pick up my soda again, and pull the handle. Still locked. Fucking A. My key fob is so stupid. I know I've pushed that stupid button, but it's hard to tell because it doesn't move or push in, so you never know if you've actually unlocked the doors (like I thought) or didn't (like I did). Getting exasperated now and feeling the eyes of the people in the store looking at me and the people behind me getting gas looking at me, I resist the urge to stomp my feet like a garden gnome Rumpelstiltskin. Still not able to see out from under my hat, I put the soda down again, dig out my keys again (how the hell did they wiggle back down to the bottom of my purse, anyway?) and just as I'm about to REALLY unlock the hell out of this door, I catch a glimpse of black from under my chapeau to my left. Something that looks a lot like my car. Just like the car I'm standing in front of. Which is NOT my car, though it's the same stupid model and color. 

So if you were near my Super America today, I hope you got a big horse laugh out of the stupid puffy gnome trying to break into cars in broad daylight with a dozen witnesses. My stupidity and I aim only to please.