Last year my Branden had a whole lot of money for his birthday and apparently not enough toys to spend it on. He'd have done well on the old Wheel of Fortune when you had to spend all of your money, even if it meant, "Ummm......okay, Pat, I'll take the dalmation for $250." We were furniture shopping, and Branden found a video gaming chair on sale for $50. He wanted to use his own money to buy one. We figured what the hell, we sure weren't gonna buy one of the ugly ass things with OUR money. Talk about coming back to bite us in the ass - they sell them in every damn color and the kid picks Sunkist orange. We should've known, the kid has been wearing orange every day for a year, but obviously we were drunk that day.
Fast forward to moving into this small apartment. A few days after moving in, I notice the chair is shoved in his closet. I ask him why, he says there's no room. I look around at all the room there is and question if we're looking at the same room. He then tells me that actually his dad told him that he would like to get rid of it if Branden would let him. At this point, Branden said he would be willing to let it go - for $50. I said, "Excuse me? What?" "I told dad if he wants to buy the chair from me for $50, I would let him."
Uh huh.
Now I'm hoping Jay wasn't stupid enough to fall for this. "What did your dad say?""He said no."
Yay! He's not that stupid.
"Now I said he can have it for $20."
Jay came home a little while later and I was waiting for him. "Did you know your son is trying to extort money from us?" He said, "What? The orange chair? Yeah, but I've got him down to $20 right now, so it's getting to be a good deal!"
Holy shit.
Queen of my own Magic Kingdom, full of all the irreverent, obnoxious, and sometimes offensive sarcasm you know and love. I don't care what people think of me, but I do care if you like my blog. Read, forward, repeat.
