Why I Refuse To Be Racist

I came across this article on a friend's page recently and found it to be wonderfully written and a very honest and accurate disclosure of how most white people feel, or at least how most white people I know feel, and it most definitely reflects how I feel as well. The article is titled, "Why I'm A Racist..." While I take issue with the title, it's a great read and I truly believe everyone should take the time to absorb it all,

Why I'm A Racist...

I agree 100% with what the author says, but I still cringe at the use of the word "racist," even when it's intended as an empathetic self-admission of the inability to understand what it's like to walk in another's different colored footsteps. On the other hand, it could also be a discussion about how white people may feel guilty that our lives are different than those of black people, even when every other factor is exactly the same, and yes, that can make us feel very, very wrong. However, I worry that when white people start to think it's socially acceptable to call ourselves racist when what we REALLY mean to say is we don't understand, it becomes almost an apologetic permission to continue that behavior or, unfortunately, behave even worse. Consider how many people have suddenly felt so "free" now that Donald Trump says "what everyone else is already thinking." Just because someone with a lot of money and the ability to publicly declare how much of a jackass he is does so, it doesn't mean it's okay to feel that way as well.

I read a similar article a few days ago about why wives should learn to be submissive to their husbands. Just the word "submissive" is enough to create mental fingernails on a chalkboard that could cause every suffragette in the past to roll over in their graves. Again, the article was a thoughtfully written essay that really was just about learning to put the needs of your spouse first so that they in turn will put your needs first, a marital you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours, but there again is another one of these incendiary words to grab your attention. It's a sad attempt to negate the current meaning of the word in hopes that it can revert back to the original definition, but that's a hard pill to swallow, given how strong the connotations really are in the present. The strength of that negativity really can never be undone, just like it will NEVER be okay for me to use the n**** word. The meaning behind that word, spoken by a white person, will never lose its hateful intent, and I feel the same about trying to soften the blow of the word "racist."

I am white, I am NOT a racist, but I admit I will NEVER understand what it's like to be a black person, and THAT'S what we should be focusing on. The fact that there IS a difference between me and another person in this country, when everything else is the same and only the color of our skin is different, that's what's wrong. We have to be compassionately together, not separating ourselves further.

Again, I agree with this article and think it's a very accurate discussion about how many white people feel, not just in the midst of so much recent violence, but on an everyday basis. But.....I think calling ourselves racist as an explanation for our inability to fully understand the ocean-sized difference in the life of a black person versus our own benefits no one. What we need is more understanding, more compassion, and more willingness toward making changes. What we don't need are more labels.