Jay and I have a disagreement, and it's one of those completely 100% divisive ones where women will nod and say, "I know EXACTLY what you mean!" and men will shake their heads and chalk it up to PMS nonsense. There can be no middle of the road symphathizers; it's either an X or a Y chromosome reaction.
My husband, adventurous as he is, "takes" me everywhere. This has nothing to do with my inability to figure out north wherever I am (my truck now has a compass so that disability is under control.) Nor does he enjoy taking me out to dinner, dancing, movies, the thee-it-TAR, or anything that suggests I'm constantly being whisked away on fabulous adventures. Also, he does not own a magic carpet (though I'm sure that's what the alpaca fur is used for and I can't wait to own both).
Why does this make me angry? This is why: I'm not crippled. I'm not in a wheelchair. I'm not 14 and I'm not 62. More than anything, though, I am NOT his mother. Woman that I love, she does nothing on her own and actually DOES get "taken" where she needs or wants to go. She does not fly and she does not boat (yes, I'm starting to sound like Dr. Suess, but bear with me.) She will drive, but only as long as it's not far, dark, within 2 hours of becoming dark, raining, snowing, looks like rain/snow, just rained/snowed, or without at least 3 days' notice. Otherwise, the "taking" must occur. She is a wonderful woman who was married to an amazingly doting wonderful husband, and she has earned her place in the "taking" situations.
I, on the other hand, while also married to an amazingly wonderful husband (though not so doting, mostly 'cuz I think HE thinks it has to do w/being back in the 1800's or something), but alas, after being brought up by the above parents, he feels his place is to "take" me wherever WE go. It doesn't matter who drives or whether we've been there before. Since we've been married, Jay has forever been "taking" me places, and when I hear him SAY that to someone, "I took Trish down to XXXX place last week" it truly makes me want to scream. He is my Superman, but until he wears the skin tight suit & literally flies me off in his arms, he has not "taken" me anywhere. We WENT there. We've GONE places. We've DRIVEN somewhere. The important part he can't wrap his brain around is that it's a WE thing, not a selfish "I" thing.
As an added interesting dilemma, he refuses to "take" me upstairs at night and that is always phrased as "I'm going up." or "Do you want to go up?" like there's a stupid ass hot air balloon tied down at the base of the stairs that's gonna float us up to our bedroom. I'm not even talking sex here; I'm just saying "Do you want to go up?" is what you say when you have overnight guests and you're too tired to sit up watching TV any longer. Last night I gave him the "What the hell is WRONG with you???" look when he said it, and he said, "You are so stupid. From now on, I'm not saying ANYTHING. I'm just gonna grab you by the hand and drag you upstairs!"
And I said, "FINALLY!!!!!!!! Now THAT's what I've been talking about!" He just shook his head and maybe flipped me off. Suffice it to say, we did NOT go up together.
So, readers, feel free to weign in on this one, be ye male or female. Who is right? (I already know I am, but sometimes I feel a TEENSY bit of democracy can be fun.)
Queen of my own Magic Kingdom, full of all the irreverent, obnoxious, and sometimes offensive sarcasm you know and love. I don't care what people think of me, but I do care if you like my blog. Read, forward, repeat.
