My puppy is so sad that he doesn't get to go outside when Ginger does. Ginger wishes she could go potty inside like the puppy can. Neither can speak, so I'm really assuming this is what they both think, and I've gone ahead and created a little jealous sibling rivalry in my mind for them, for which no thanks is necessary (but I'm quite certain they would if they could).
Today was one of the rare days that I decided to let puppy go out. Rare because most days I don't want to get up off my ass to go outside, but work is so busy that I actually welcomed the chance. I got bundled up and then bundled up Pups in his adorable purple ski jacket (tres chic). Ginger was already wearing her fur coat (which is equally exquisite) so we were all ready. As we were out, I felt in my pockets for mittens which are always there. Imagine my annoyance when I didn't find them, but imagine my surprise to find instead a receipt w/a $10 bill wrapped in it.
For those of you who've been following my madness, you will recall that I previously accused one of my brats of stealing my money (not to their face, just to the world in my blog). Deciding to find out if this was the missing money from THAT post, I dig it out of the archives only to find that it was a $20 bill, and it was last September. This was a $10 bill and it was from February.
Some people may think, "Hooray! Her kids aren't thieves after all!" But you would be fools 'cuz this proves nothing for them. Even worse, it proves that not only am I truly going crazy, but apparently it's been going on much longer than I thought. So I warn you all now - love me while you can, because who knows how much longer I'll be coherent. Oh, and definitely steer clear of my kids because I'm pretty sure one of them is stealing from me. Wait, that sounds familiar.....
Update: It's even worse than I feared. When I told The Banksta about the missing money, he informed me that had we invested that money, we would most definitely be up 15 cents by now. So not only am I going crazy, apparently I'm bankrupting us in the process. This must be why they make commercials for old people to get life insurance. I probably shouldn't be allowed to have email since so many people have found "my" lost millions of dollars and want me to have it for just a small finder's fee.
Queen of my own Magic Kingdom, full of all the irreverent, obnoxious, and sometimes offensive sarcasm you know and love. I don't care what people think of me, but I do care if you like my blog. Read, forward, repeat.
